The Licensing Game 

1. Orientation
2. Start
3. Send in application
4. Call licensor because of no response to application
5. Application lost, return to START.
6. While crawling around measuring floor space, your back gives out,
lose 1 turn.
7. First home visit
8. Your kids act up in front of licensor, GO BACK 1
9. Licensor finds beer in your fridge-offer her one
10. Your fridge temp is 43. Licenser makes you buy new one
11. Extra paperwork, LOSE 1 TURN
12. Argue with licensor over where to put dieffenbachia
13. READ RULE. Remain here til you understand it
14. Find thermometer licensor left in fridge, GO FORWARD 1
15. Working on your policy, LOSE A WEEKEND (and sleep)
16. Counting your toys and equipment, LOSE 1 TURN
17. You try to fit a bright red fire extinguisher into your pastel
blue kitchen
18. Your daughter refuses to give up her pet chicken. Apply for
variance, WAIT 2 TURNS
19. You remove your double-key deadbolt lock, next day a burglar
steals your computer.
20. A reference letter got lost, GO BACK 1
21. Visit 11 stores trying to find a 2 3/8" diameter sphere to check
your crib.
22. Your husband objects when you practice unlocking the bathroom
door while he is showering.
23. Wait for fire inspection. LOSE 2 TURNS
24. Police confuse your name with that of public enemy #1 SPEND
WEEKEND WITH FBI
25. Learn from police report your husband has a hidden past. File
for divorce.
26. Licensor objects to your substituting maple syrup for Ipecac
syrup.
27. Second home visit.
28. Fire Marshal come. YOU PASS! GO FORWARD 2 spaces
29. Spring thaw. Licensor finds ditch drain in back yard. Requires
fence. LOSE 1 TURN
30. Licensor says it won't be long now.
31. Computer rejects your name, GO BACK 2
32. First run-in with unreasonable parent, Cry all night
33. You don't understand how may children you may have LOSE 1 TURN
34. You spot your licensor in Target during working hours. GO
FORWARD 3 AND TAKE ANOTHER TURN
35. License comes, is incorrect, GO BACK 2
36. Take eight children to the park, come back with 7 PANIC
37. Parents pay bonus for potty training! FAINT
38. Receive letter from licensor saying you're recommended for
licensure. GO FORWARD 1
39. Receive 1st Food program check. CELEBRATE
40. Drop-in complaint. If you have too many children, GO BACK 1, if
not GO FORWARD 2
41. Call licensor with problem. Not at desk, will call you back.
42. Ditto
43. Ditto
44. Licensor calls but by now problem has solved itself
45. Tax laws change, You are paralyzed with shock. LOSE 2 TURNS
46. Drop in visit. If your hair is in curlers, GO BACK 1, if not GO
FORWARD 1
47. Your child shoots licensor with water gun. Pretend not to notice.
48. Relicensing due! No training, GO BACK 1
49. Boring training session, fall asleep. LOSE 1 TURN
50. Neighbor calls you a babysitter. Punch him in the nose.
51. Relicensing. RETURN TO START!

~author unknown